well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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