Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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