Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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