Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize