but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
