Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
