forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
how does that bad decision feel?
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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