Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Shitshow foam night was such a success
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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