? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize