if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
dude. I can hear the air.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize