none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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