Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Please don't give away my fajitas
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