the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
There r osticjed everywhere
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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