i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
