Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
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