john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Randomize
