that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
