people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
