i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I deserve this hangover.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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