Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
