Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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