Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
