do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
You dont lie about slip and slides
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
