when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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