I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
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