Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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