So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
