i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Randomize
