Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I just threw up on my dentist
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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