1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
