You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
