I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I have surprise drugs for everyone
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
