Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Randomize
