My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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