All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
