so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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