I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
