I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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