So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
