I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I have tasted many bathrooms
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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