I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize
