Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
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