This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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