we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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