My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I am mentally ready for anal.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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