do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
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