Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Dignity is for republicans.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
