there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I think people are normalizing furries
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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