your room smells of hookers.
And success
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize
