Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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