my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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